And the day arrived

I have been MIA from blogging lately. Yesterday was the big 26.2 for me. I still don’t know if I was ready for it or not.

There were many revelations that came to me on my very, very long run. One, I have no pride left in me. The bad kind of pride that makes me hate when people pass me up. People were passing me every minute and I never caught up with them. Damn, my ego left me and hopefully for good.

The discouragement of this stayed with me for the first 3/4 of my race. Then after shedding a few tears, feeling the pain everywhere in my body, I realized the only person judging me is myself. The people passing me certainly are not judging me and the people cheering at the aid stations aren’t either. All those people know it is difficult running 26 miles is and just doing it, no matter how fast, is still a feat of courage, determination and strength.

My goal was to have a 10 minute mile pace. Let’s be real now. My average pace throughout yesterday’s run was 13:48. I am proud I just completed the run. The time means nothing to me right now because not everyone can say they have done something like that. That was the most difficult thing I have ever done in my entire life, physically and mentally.

Everyone deserves support for something so amazing as pushing your body to the extreme. Without a strong mind it wouldn’t be possible. I learned that yesterday. I don’t need to be the best. I am extremely humbled.

Confessions from race day include:

– I pretended I had to pee just so I could sit down in the portal-potty for a minute because ‘tying your shoes’ is so overdone.

-I kept thinking how much I never want to run a marathon again and perhaps maybe never even run again, which is the second thing I said after finishing. The first thing I said, through mumbling tears and struggles for breathe, was that was the hardest thing I have ever done.

-My first thought waking up this morning was maybe next time I will get five hours. Haha. Runners really are crazy.

Best part of the race include:

-Around mile two or three you cross through Carlsbad Village and when you reach the top you come down the hill toward a beautiful view of the ocean. The moon was still glowing in purple sky, darkness still lingering.

-After mile 21 I was struggling from lack of food energy and an older lady and her friend I was talking to that were running the half marathon offered me grapes and it literally saved my day.

-Seeing Nic running on one of the turn-arounds lifted my spirits so much and gave me a lot of encouragement.

Yesterday, running and I broke up. Today I think we are on the road to recovery.